Anyways....I LOVE the weather here at night. I'm going to soak up EVERY second of it while I can before I have to go back to the Bay area's cold nights. I felt a little sad to leave Berkeley today, since I've only been there for 2 weeks and I'm just starting to make friends and get into my Tibetan class/studying.
Yesterday my friend, Kersten, who is my Tibetan class buddy and my new friend/Tibetan tutor, Pema, took me to a yummy Vietnamese lunch (I love pho!) and then we walked around the Berkeley Marina by the Bay. It was sunny, windy and beautiful. Pema and I were instantly friends, which was to be expected since Rinpoche had asked if he could tutor me and he's got amazing intuition. We're going to start meeting when I get back to town.
Overall, I feel a little like an observer looking in on a sea I used to swim in. The people here are really into being "cool" and I'm pretty much the opposite of cool these days. The people in the Bay area are, too, but I'm new there, so it feels different to me. I used to be "cool" when I lived in Austin. I was expecting to feel this, maybe that's why I am.
When I truly let my heart open and I act naturally, I'm not worried about these superficial things. It's just an observation. My complete commitment to my spiritual practice and my true nature are finally weighing the scales to the side I've run away from my whole life. Just continually sitting with that openness and not being swayed by the people around me, being with that....I have a confidence that I've never felt before. It's hard to explain.
:)
3 comments:
I have to say, I think popular culture invades pretty much all 1st world societies so it's not surprising that any city you go to is full of people who think it is important to be cool. I actually find SF to be much more like that than Austin. Tokyo and Osaka were also very much like that.
You are the epitome of cool. i love you!!!
Thanks! Gen!
I also think that's true, Sarah. Fortunately, my cool friends in Austin also don't embody those superficial values, which is why I love you guys!
I also see a lot of my own insecurities in other people and the need to fit in, judge, etc...so I can relate.
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